Tag Archives: Opinion

Small Milestones to help me keep going

I have a problem with being consistent with my posts, and well most things to be honest. Although, I have big ambitions, I don’t always and mostly never follow through with my plans. I’ve realized that most of my downfalls can be attributed to the fact that I always become so engrossed in my huge ideas that I lose sight of the small steps and little accomplishments I have made to progressing to my goals. I also feel hopeless when my ultimate goals are so far away from where I am that I just shut down. One thing I’ve decided to do to continue towards achieving my goals and not giving up is to not only celebrate the small milestones, but to also remember that I need to keep taking small baby steps forward even when I tumble and fall backwards in my progression. I logged on to this blog tonight originally to post something but I didn’t really have anything in mind. As I looked through the analytics of the paltry handful of visitors I have (I really appreciate you all! I fall into the trap that social media and the internet brings of likes and shares meaning popularity), I noticed a notification “You’ve received 100 likes on your blog”. For some this might not seem like a lot, but for me at that particular moment, it gave me an immense feeling of elation and gratitude for all those who browse random blogs and have found something of worth or value in this one. My musings are more often than not streams of consciousness that I rarely edit if ever, maybe a word here or there, but that happens on the fly. So I don’t usually see any meaning in what I write, and I’ve stated this before, this blog is mostly for me to have a space where I just muse to myself. I do appreciate all of you people who do take the time to read, like, comment and share (although I don’t think many people share this). I gives me hope that maybe, I am making a difference in the lives of strangers (albeit a really small insignificant one probably). I’ll never know the impact I have on others, or whether I even have any impact on people at all. Maybe that’s how life is supposed to be, just go about doing good, regardless of whether or not you make a difference in the world. Go about chasing your dreams despite any negative thoughts you may come across. Move forward with the belief that you’re being honest to yourself and your God (should you choose to believe in a higher power). As long as you keep taking small steps, celebrating the little milestones, never stopping your journey forward towards whatever drives you and your passions.

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Racially Oversensitive?

So this happened to me last week and I’m still a bit miffed by this thing that happened to me last week. I was at work, when a customer came up to me and said “magandang hapon” which for those of you who don’t speak Tagalog means Good Morning in English. Like many of you, I had no clue what was being said because I’m not Filipino. The only reason I know how to say good morning in Tagalog is thanks to Google Translate, so basically I don’t know how to say it. Now normally I would just brush it off to ignorance after I looked at him with confusion, he proceeded to follow up with “oh what are you?” Or something to that effect. I responded with I’m Chinese, and I don’t speak Tagalog. He then blurted out some form of “ni hao” which caused me to be somewhat offended. I’m not sure if it was the manner in which this whole exchange happened or whether it was due to the fact that he just assumed my ethnicity. It just confuses me as to why people think it’s okay to assume someone’s race or ethnicity, then blurt out the only phrase you know in their language as if to say “Hey I can speak your language so connect with me on that level”. Now don’t get me wrong here, I do understand the desire to share what you know of another language with native speakers of that language. However I’ve never, despite wanting to greet Hispanic customers, blurted out anything like “buenos dias” or “que quieres” because I understand that I have nothing to follow it up with other than “sorry that’s all I know because I learned some Spanish years ago but have since forgotten most of it and haven’t kept it up enough to carry a conversation”.

I think the reason this irks me so much is because you’d never see anyone of any other ethnicity just shout random English phrases to Caucasians and be like sorry I don’t know anything else. Or maybe you would and I’m just overly sensitive about the subject matter. Is it just me being racially over sensitive or is this something that we as a society should stop doing?

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Loss of Civility and Increase of Hate

I’ve been very contemplative about a lot of issues as of late. The one thing that I’ve noticed is that people on either side of any issue will have a knee jerk reaction causing things like name calling, immediate disregard for open and civil conversation, and creation of a sort of mob mentality (rallying those supporting their view to a cry for action against the “other”).
 
I’m struggling to understand why people become so hard-line in their beliefs, or why people can’t even fathom coming to some sort of resolution that benefits both parties in some way. We seem to be perfectly fine with open name calling and slanderous behaviour so long as it benefits our cause, but we teach our children that things like bullying is wrong. We teach them in church to love one another, yet in an online forum, we spread rumours and lies to tear down those we view as our opponents in things we are passionate about. We are quick to place blame on others, but never look within to ask “is it I?”.
 
I know that contention over various issues political and non political are more complex than just agreeing with the other side or trying to find a middle ground. I know I’m over generalizing things but it just seems that there is an overall lack of humanity or civility in an ever shrinking world.
 
I suppose it is the prophecy that “For behold, at that day shall he rage in the hearts of the children of men, and stir them up to anger against that which is good”. I know that we are living in those times right now and whether you’re religious or not, I just wonder where we will end up if we continue down this road that we are travelling on…

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Fact checking with Bias

So unless you’ve been in a hole hidden away from media and society, you’ll know that politics is a hot button issue in the social media world. Every few posts I see on my Facebook news feed is either pro or anti Trump, or extreme liberal or conservative. These posts are often met with what I’ll call “radical views” (not actually that radical but somewhat devisive views) and comments. I enjoy reading them from time to time as they sometimes are amusing to hear banter and read the various viewpoints of my friends. The thing that bothers me more often than not is when people debate but back their facts with extremely biased sites. I’m all for debate and discussion and I do see the need to back your arguments with facts but it doesn’t really support your cause if you’re using biased media outlets like Breitbart, the Blaze or Slate and the New Yorker. The reason for this is that the articles and opinions on those sites are incredibly bias. 

Why does this matter? Facts are facts right? Well yes and no. Yes facts are facts, but not entirely. For example, if I’m looking at the world through my blue tinted sunglasses, I could look at something yellow and say it’s green, or something red and say it’s purple. Does that make what I see wrong? Perhaps but let’s apply this to the whole liberal/conservative issue. If I watch the Colbert report and see a clip that says Trump is a moron for appointing Betsy DeVos as the secretary of Education and reasons to show why that’s the case, if I had a liberal bias that would just reaffirm my own personal beliefs and then I would share it and think, that’ll teach those conservatives. Conversely if I as a conservative then saw something on Breitbart telling me that the Colbert report is stupid because of these reasons, I would feel justified in thinking that my views were right to begin with and Betsy DeVos should be secretary of Education because she’s the best suited for it (I personally don’t care – I’m Canadian). Biased views will produce bias opinions and it’s easy to find bias in research and statistics if you’re looking hard enough.

Now you might be asking why should this matter? Well if you care for facts and truth then it should matter where you gather your facts or “alternative facts” as it may be. It doesn’t support your cause in trying to change views or opinions, if that is indeed your point in posting anything like this. Yes it’s nice to be on the winning team from time to time but really when you post something from a bias media outlet you frequent and support it just seems like a huge circle jerk. 

I guess what I’m trying to get at here is that there needs to be a way to bridge the gap between the two sides. People need to be more open to understanding and open to civil conversation. I understand that often people go into conversations under the pretense that they’ll be civil but when you go swinging arguments using your biased media outlets articles, you’re not looking for a civil open conversation. You want an all out brawl guns a blaze, because that’s exactly how those outlets write their articles. They hope to incite anger and cause contention because that is the very fuel that keeps them going, taking all of their passengers along for the Blazing ride down Slate road watching the world burn down around them.

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Public Displays of Affection (PDA)

Over the last little while, I’ve noticed a lot of people post a lot of things about relationships, about their significant others in my social networks. There are others that are generally just be lovey dovey and cutesy with their partners in public, holding hands, kissing, making out etc. Now, I want everyone to understand that I am not a cynic about love and romance as this post may make me seem as such. What I will say is that while it’s fine to be in love, a majority of people don’t care to see obsessive public displays of affection or PDA.

There are two main things that I want to gripe about right now, the first being the physical exhibitions of PDA. I understand that couples are in love wish to share their love in a physical way however, much like most things in life, there is a time and a place for everything. I am okay with a simple kiss, some hand holding or hugs, but anything beyond that is obsessive for me. What I’m talking about is those couples who are adorably in love and want to make sure that you and everyone around you know that they’re in love. They’re the ones that have no shame making out in front of people, or who are so hot for each other that everyone else around them just becomes a nuisance to their expressions of love. The reason why these people bother me so much is not because they’re in love as I am pro love, They bother me because it almost becomes inconsiderate how much or how far they’ll go to express their love for each other. Lots of individuals who are single don’t need to be reminded of their singleness by seeing these people. I think the key here is moderation. For example, water gun fights are fun for everyone involved. You bring your little super soaker, and you shoot each other and everyone has a jolly good time. How I equate excessive PDA in this scenario is people who choose to ignore the unspoken guidelines of bringing a water gun to this fight, and decide to go all out bringing a firetruck hooked up to the street  hydrant to blow anyone out of the water.  Ok that’s a weak example but that’s how I see excessive PDA on a physical level.

The second excessive use of PDA is the social media love explosions. The posts that appear to be seemingly cute and adorable are actually bombs of disappointment waiting to happen. These couples set unrealistic expectations of the concept of love. You know the ones I’m talking about, the posts that show their undying love for one another, and often equate their love to some fictitious story like Romeo and Juliet (which, in my opinion isn’t very romantic). Don’t get me wrong here either, I’m not saying people shouldn’t express their love for each other through social media, I think there are appropriate times to do so, but the ones I’m talking about are people who post on the daily how much they are in love. How they can’t live without each other, or how they just want the world to feel how grossly into each other they are.

Maybe I am a bit of a cynic when it comes to matters of the heart, or maybe I’m just tired of all these people being too far in their efforts. Moderation is all I’m asking for. If you think you’re one of these people just tone it back a bit. You can be that much in love with another person but just keep it to yourself. The rest of the world doesn’t need a humble brag about how much you love each other. But that’s just my opinion.

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Sex, Drugs and Stability

So last night on a random request from a friend… I suppose you can call her a friend, although we barely talk and even so very superficially, I guess she’s somewhere between friend and acquaintance… On the request from my friend, she asked me to talk to her friend last night to cheer her up because she was depressed. Which is a very strange request in general because she essentially asked me to talk to a stranger. I don’t know what prompted me to talk to her but I agreed and then gave this random girl my number. It was kind of strange because it felt like she was interested in a relationship or at least someone to get her mind off of some guy. As the conversation went on she began to express her emotions and why it was that she was so sad or depressed. After talking for a bit, she asked me if I was still a virgin and then responded with shock and surprise after hearing I was. She then proceeded to probe me on this and it was sort of an interesting realization for me. I know that there are many people in their 20’s that are sexually active but it never occurred to me that people who choose to remain separate from the whole world of sexuality would be a minority. I’m probably making all sorts of unnecessary assumptions and have basically generalized the population in saying that being sexually active is just a norm, which I can’t say for sure whether it is or not because it’s one of those topics that while people are more open with in general. As individuals it still seems to be much of a taboo subject to talk about and usually only with your closest friends and definitely not family.

ANYWAYS, back to my point about sexuality and my choice to remain away from it. People make the argument that sex with someone deepens the relationship with another individual and I don’t disagree with this point, however I feel as if people use this excuse to justify having sex with whomever they’re dating or are attracted to at the time. I’m probably very old fashioned in my thoughts and beliefs but I feel that there are many who jump too quickly into this aspect of a relationship. I think the current generation of young adults often acts without thought to consequences, acting on the basis that YOLO solves everything. I hate the term YOLO and its usages in society, more often than not with idiotic actions associated (another topic for another day). While there are benefits with sex, there are a lot of consequences that result as well. I have a friend who had unprotected sex and she got pregnant. She was devastated and ended up getting an abortion because she wasn’t ready to settle down and have a child. She was depressed for several weeks because this is something that is very traumatizing for a woman. This sadly happens more than is necessary because people think about living in the now and not what could happen in the future. I always like the saying, that we can make our choices on how to act, but we can’t choose the consequences of our actions. Much like a rippling of a stone in the water, while our actions may seem small and insignificant, its reach and effects can extend beyond our understanding and scope of life.

I guess my point in writing this post is just to say that as a society and individuals we need to be more aware and conscious that our actions do have consequences (whether good or bad). We should have intelligence licenses, because there really are a lot of people out there who for some reason or another believe that YOLO makes them invincible. That what they do only hurts them and them alone, but there is never any action that has consequences that only affect a single person. I suppose this rant is sort of incoherent because it was written over the course of a week in short bursts of 20 minutes in my children’s literature class. 🙂 Moral of the story – Think before you act and be prepared to deal with the consequences of life. Sex complicates everything. Stop being stupid.

There’s my two cents for today.

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