The birds and the bees

As valentines approaches I suppose it’s appropriate to blog about some of my views on love. Well not really so much as appropriate but I feel almost like I need to give into the trend of blogging about love and romance. So first off, I’ll start by saying I am in no ways an expert in the field of love. Nor do I profess to be so, all I do is make observations about what works or doesn’t work in my life. I guess this is kind of funny because I’m not even in a relationship right now and I’m trying to sort out my own love life right now. Basically I’m single and looking. Go figure.

I feel like I’m at the stage in my life where I should at very least look for a relationship, not that I haven’t been in them before but for one reason or another I ended them. But I feel they were genuinely good reasons for ending a relationship, half of the time they were because I had bad reasons for starting relationships. So that’s why my first point I suppose would be, see if you’re compatible beyond your first impression of the person of your interest. I say this because there have been a few times where I dated a girl that I was interested in her looks but I never really got to know them more and once I did.. well. I’m single. I guess that’s all that needs to be said about that.

I think the second thing is that while physical intimacy is important in relationships, it shouldn’t be the central focus of the relationship. Get to know each other, learn about one another, then find things to build meaningful relationships around. Life goals, aspirations, hopes, dreams and wishes. Whatever it is, look for it. I feel like this is just very superficial in what I’m blogging about because I don’t necessarily ascribe to formulas for love. I think when it happens it happens. Nothing you do or don’t do will change it.

If you like someone, go for it. Do what suits you and go after it. If you don’t take risks then it’s not worth it. Anything worth doing will cause you to extend out of your comfort zone and take chances. Like Miss Frizzle from the magic school bus always says “Take chances, Make mistakes, Get Messy!” I think once you do this, if you take chances, you’ll learn to build more courage and confidence in yourself. Don’t worry about making mistakes, because mistakes will help you become better through improvement. We learn through experience, we learn faster through making mistakes. You’ll find what works for you and how to hone that craft that is dating/romance/love. Getting messy seems self explanatory, think back to some of the best times in your childhood. For me it was always either painting or playing in the sand or water box at school. Think about it, those are some of the messiest activities you can do as a child. I don’t know I think those were always the most fun…. where was I going with this?

I suppose all this rant is trying to say is that life is too short to not be spending your time with people in your life who don’t love you. And it’s definitely too short to be wallowing in sadness of failed love, being alone, or not living your dreams. I think it goes back to chasing your dreams. Once you do that and start living your life, in that same manner then you’ll be happy with life, when you’re happy, you’ll be more confident. When you’re more confident well people will want to spend time with you, to be around you and ultimately, when the time is right something will happen. Just give it time, don’t give up and just be who you are. I’m a firm believer that everyone will find love in this life. For those of you who are single don’t be afraid to open your eyes and look at what’s around you. Sometimes you’ll find love in the most unexpected of places. I know I have in the past, and I will in the future.

So as for the Birds and the Bees? Well, they are what they are and they do what they do regardless of whether we pay any attention to them at all. So why not just be happy and keep on living your dreams.

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